OK, here it is. What happened. All of it (as I remember it- and I've been seriously trying to forget it for 48 plus hours and not succeeding). I'm pretty sure my Mom tried to bring me up better; don't blame her, it's not her fault.
I'll start like this- the more I ride 'em the more I 'very-much-strongly-dislike-have-no-affinity-at-all-for' trains... esp the night ones.

Looks so innocent from here, eh? hahaha
And yes, we have it much better than some places. Ticket prices are such that we can get a sleeper compartment with 4 beds (2 above, 2 below) that are reasonably comfortable.

There you go. Upper and lower. The other 2 are across from these (it's very elementary, My Dear.)
Really, how to launch into this? We got on the train- 7.30 pm (there-abouts). Nice and early. Should be a decent night's sleep. (OK- here's where I contradict myself- I don't get 'decent-night's-sleeps' on trains- there's cigarette smoke, rocking, jolting, swaying, clanging, banging, lights flashing, hot-as-an-oven heat, people coming and going and talking and sometimes getting into your compartment at 2 am because, after all, that's when the train reaches their town so what are they supposed to do? and more... and somehow, I just get tense when we get on the train.) So we're on. In the compartment next to ours are several young males (I refuse to say 'young men' when referring to them) and they are drinking and already talking funny. I'm instantly tenser. But, I'm also prepared for moments like this. I know how and where to lock our door (and do-these guys don't look like your average ordinary drinking male Eastern Eur'n- they look more like Polish bad-attitude gang guys- and I don't like it.) Fine. Also, I have a cd player with book cd's (currently Russian) and also ultra-relaxing very soft 'you-heard-it-at-your-dentist's-first' instrumental music- because I know I might need it. I get ready for bed and plug myself in... as the party next door winds up. This goes on for hours and I keep thinking, I'll hit a stretch of Denise B (hi Denise- did you know your piano relaxes me?) soon that'll block it all out. At midnight I switch to earplugs. Sometime around 1 am, I give up and stick my head out the door and find them all congregated not in their compartment but in the hallway, spilling over in front of our door.

(this is how narrow the hallways are- this one has some much nicer people congregating in it)
I say, "Please, can you be quieter? Some of us are trying to sleep." I have not done this before because they don't seem like the kind of drunks you want to open a dialog with... but I know I'm going to do something crazy soon if I don't. So I do. One of them coke-bottle-glasses looks at me and says, "Please excuse us, I'm sorry" and there is instant silence and withdrawing into the compartment. (Turns out that guy was from another compartment and he went to bed then.) About 10 min later, they're back in the hallway and singing...loudly... I take a deep breath, open the door and see a knot of males...drunk...holding more liquor than you'd care to see... another deep breath and plunge through them to the other side and down to the conductor's compartment. "Please come do something about these guys" I say; "we have a full schedule tomorrow in Kyiv and so far haven't been able to sleep at all because of them and I asked them nicely (it really was nicely) to stop..." she follows me back down the hall. Keep in mind that she looks to be about 18 and is about 1/3 my size. She talks to them and I head back to our door. I become aware that one of the drunks is loudly complaining that I bumped him and stepped on the top of his foot when I headed down the hall (I'm sure he's right- how could anyone get through there without bodily injury?)- and he keeps on complaining about me and my getting the conductor... and at this point, IT happens. IT has never happened before. I don't even remember how or anything- suddenly I had 2 glasses of some sort of booze in my hand and dropped them on the floor and then the next minute I had a completely full bottle of vodka and bottle of beer in my hands and I was on my way to the toilet. Dumped the beer, pitched the bottle; vodka trickling out so simply drop the whole thing into the toilet and open the hole at the bottom and it hits the tracks beneath us... then I go back to bed. And this is where I think "What did you just do? Do people like you DO that?! Yikes." Huge adrenaline rush and I'm shaking...and as happens, post-adrenaline, I also fall asleep... for a bit. Fast forward to 2 am. Knocking on the door. The conductor... with a (faint) police officer... (yes indeed)- "Ma'am we need you to come down to my compartment and fill out a formal complaint"- thankfully she said that fast enough that I didn't have time to pass out before she got it all out. Away we go. First I apologize to the conductor for 'losing it'; she says, "No, no need. I'd been there 3 times already and tried to stop them and had no success; so I called the police; we're kicking them off the train..." gulp. And Whew. I'm not sure what all I thought could have possibly logically taken place, but of course, this is the thing that makes sense. There are cops always on the trains (I'm pretty sure) for just such occasions...and they have the right to 'deboard' unruly passengers. Since I talked to the conductor, they figured I was the likely one to fill out a formal complaint. Which I did. The cop dictated it to me since I've never in my live-long life done anything of the sort- and especially not over here (perish the thought). And then I signed it. And then he escorted me back to our compartment. Because them boys was NOT happy. And they were in the corridor. Gulp. And then he escorted Ala down there to co-sign. I never asked her if she was happy about that or not... not much point, really. Who would be? Well, the rest of the night was quiet all right... and short. Cops left about 2.30; train arrived at 6.30... yawn. Last night, coming back, was blissful in comparison. Somehow, I don't think this is going to help the big picture 'try-to-relax-and-sleep-on-the-train' thing... but I'm glad enough to have had a very positive experience with the law enforcement over here...just sorry it had to happen. And how sorry...

Here are some of us, at another time, happy and cozy in our compartment. That's me on the top bunk...
note: This is far and away the worst thing I've ever encountered on a train- let me make that clear. It can be noisy but never have I seen anything like this before. I've never felt unsafe on a train.